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Funny Bush Moments - Bushisms

Funny Bush Moments - Bushisms Funny Bush Moments

We find George W Bush personally likeable and part of that appeal lies in his interpersonal skills, his verbal gaffes and his tendency to jumble words, some of which we offer to our readers here.  None is meant as a political comment.

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Will and Guy's Funny Jokes Courtesy of George W. Bush

Will and Guy are not political animals.  Indeed we would admit to knowing very little about politics and we would claim to know almost nothing about politics in the USA.  It would be wrong of us to gratuitously poke fun at George Bush or at his 8 years in the office of President of the USA, however, he has made many people laugh with his gaffes and his verbal gymnastics.

We appreciate that with the world in its present situation [Iraq and Afghanistan] that some people may find it tasteless to dwell on the President as a comic turn: we would argue that humour can often lead to a relaxation of aggression.  Comedy and tragedy often go hand in hand.

Hilarious Bushisms

  • I think war is a dangerous place.
  • Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning?
  • They misunderestimated me.
  • We must focus on building an Iran that is capable of resisting Iranian influence.
  • I want to thank my friend, Senator Bill Frist, for joining us today. He married a Texas girl, I want you to know. Karyn is with us. A West Texas girl, just like me.
  • The war on terror involves Saddam Hussein because of the nature of Saddam Hussein, the history of Saddam Hussein, and his willingness to terrorise himself.Funny Bushisms
  • For a century and a half now, America and Japan have formed one of the great and enduring alliances of modern times.
  • The ambassador and the general were briefing me on the - the vast majority of Iraqis want to live in a peaceful, free world. And we will find these people and we will bring them to justice.
  • Free societies are hopeful societies. And free societies will be allies against these hateful few who have no conscience, who kill at the whim of a hat.
  • You know, one of the hardest parts of my job is to connect Iraq to the war on terror.
  • I understand small business growth. I was one.
  • Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB/GYN's [Obstetrician/Gynaecologist] aren't able to practice their love with women all across the country.
  • Will the highways on the internet become more few?
  • Information is moving. You know, nightly news is one way, of course, but it's also moving through the blogosphere and through the Internets.
  • I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.
  • That's George Washington, the first president, of course. The interesting thing about him is that I read three - three or four books about him last year. Isn't that interesting.
  • And truth of the matter is, a lot of reports in Washington are never read by anybody. To show you how important this one is, I read it, and [Tony Blair] read it.
  • All I can tell you is when the governor calls, I answer his phone.
  • I'll be long gone before some smart person ever figures out what happened inside this Oval Office.

Will and Guy would like to thank the Guardian newspaper and BBC online for help in compiling this list of funny Bush moments.

Here are more examples collected on video.

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Funny Bush MomentsFunny Political Jokes

1) 'A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls'.  George W Bush [President USA]

2) Washington DC Newsflash: A tragic fire on Monday destroyed the personal library of President George W. Bush. Both of his books have been lost.

Presidential spokesman Ari Fleischer said the president was devastated, as he had not finished colouring the second one.

3) Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: 'Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed'. 'OH NO!' the President exclaims. 'That's terrible!'

His staff are stunned at this display of emotion, they watch nervously as the President sits, head in hands.
Finally, the President looks up and asks, 'How many is a brazillion?'

See more Presidents Day Jokes

George W. Bush Monument CommitteeBush and Columbus

Dear Friends:

We have the distinguished honor of being on the committee to raise $5,000,000 for a monument to George W. Bush. The committee originally wanted to put him on Mt. Rushmore until we discovered there was not enough room for two more faces. We then decided to erect a statue of George in the Washington, DC, Hall of Fame.

We were in a quandary as to where the statue should be placed. It was not proper to place it beside the statue of George Washington, who never told a lie, or beside Richard Nixon, who never told the truth, since George could never tell the difference.

We finally decided to place it beside Christopher Columbus, the greatest Republican of them all. He left not knowing where he was going, and when he got there he did not know where he was. He returned not knowing where he had been, decimated the well-being of the majority of the population while he was there, and did it all on someone else's money.

Thank you,
George W. Bush Monument Committee

P.S. We have raised $1.35 so far

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The Politics of Deng Xiaoping and George W BushFunny George Bush Moments

Deng Xiaoping, then leader of China, and George W Bush, President of the USA, met to discuss whose army was the bravest.

They decided to abandon politics and have a competition whereby a soldier from each army was take to the top of a tall building in Beijing and told to jump off to show their bravery.

The American soldier looked at the fall and turned to President Bush and said, 'I'm sorry, sir, but I can't do this because I have a wife and small child.' President Bush understood totally.

The Chinese soldier jumped off the skyscraper without even looking. Sometime later, having miraculously survived the fall, he spoke to President Bush who asked him, 'You are very brave, but why did you jump?'

Answering Bush, while looking at Deng Xiaoping, the Chinese soldier replied, 'Because, sir, I also have a wife and small child.'

 

Footnote:
Please write to Will and Guy if you have any funny bush moments or Bushisms

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