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Car Jokes

Time to Stop

A traffic cop pulled alongside a speeding car on the motorway. Glancing into the car, he was astounded to see that the young lady, who was driving, was knitting.

Realising that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the policeman wound down his window, turned on his loudspeaker and yelled, 'PULL OVER!'

'NO, 'the young lady yelled back, 'IT's A SCARF!'


Drive on....Classic Car Joke

A group of pensioners were discussing their medical problems at the Day Centre coffee morning.

'Do you realise,' said one, 'My arm is so weak I can hardly hold this coffee cup.'
'Yes, I know.' replied the second, 'My cataracts are so bad I can't see to pour the coffee.'
'I can't turn my head,' rejoined the third, 'because of the arthritis in my neck.'
'My blood pressure pills make my dizzy,' commented the fourth, adding, 'I guess that's the price we pay for getting old.'

'Well, it's not all bad.' piped up the first, 'We should be thankful that we can still drive.'