Funny 'Out of the Mouths of Children'
Will and Guy's Humour - Funny Out of the Mouths of Children
Selection of jokes and short stories, 'Out of the mouths of children'
A number of primary schools were doing a project on 'The Sea.' Children were asked to draw pictures or write about their experiences. Teachers got together to compare the results and put together some of the 'better' ones:
1. Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you
a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea because I think they have
to plug themselves in to chargers.
2. This is
a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles.
3. Oysters' balls are called pearls. (James age 6)
4. If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea all around you, you are incontinent. (Wayne age 7)
5. I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kyle age 6)
6. A dolphin breathes through an asshole on the top of its head. (Billy age 8 )
7. When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans. (William age 7)
8. I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)
More Funny Comments: Out of the Mouths of Children
'Mummy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do.'
The mother exclaimed, 'But that's terrible. I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this ... by the way, what was it that you didn't do?'
The little girl replied, 'My homework.'
Out of the Mouths............:
Mother: 'Why are you home from school so early?' Son: 'I was the only one who could answer a question.'
really? What was the question?'
Jasper Barnett, a young lad from St. Alban's, England was asked by his teacher to spell the word 'straight.' Jasper did so without error.
'Well done!' smiled the teacher, 'Now, Jasper, what does it mean?'
A newspaper boy was standing on the corner with a large pile of papers, shouting, 'Read all about it. Twenty five people cheated. Twenty five people cheated.'
Intrigued, a man walked over, bought a paper, and checked the front page. What he saw was yesterday's paper. The man said, 'Hey, this is an old paper, where's the story about the big swindle?' The newspaper boy ignored him and went on yelling out, 'Read all about it. Twenty six people cheated.'
An educational psychologist is asked to see a pupil who draws all his pictures with black and brown crayons. He talks to him. Nothing obvious. He gives him projective tests. Nothing shows up.
Finally, in desperation, he gives him some paper and a box of crayons.
'Oh goody, 'says the boy, 'I get an old box of crayons in school and only the black and brown were left.'
Old Goat? Another funny story out of the mouths of children
The young couple invited their aged Vicar for Sunday lunch. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked their son, what they were having.
'Goat, 'the little boy replied.
'Goat?' replied the startled man of the cloth, 'Are you sure about that?'
'Yep', said the youngster. 'I definitely heard Dad say to Mum, we might as well have the old goat for dinner today as any other day.'
Jemima's Year 6 homework task was to make sentences using the words in her spelling list, along with the definition. Coming across the word "frugal" in the list, she asked her father what it meant. He explained that being frugal meant you saved something.
Jemima's paper read, 'Frugal: to save.' Sentence: 'Little Red Riding Hood fell into a hole when she was walking in the woods so she yelled for someone to come get her out. She cried, 'Frugal me, Frugal me!'
This poem was nominated, by United Nations, as the best poem of 2006 was written by an African child
When I born, I black
And you white fellow
And you calling me coloured?
This poem was kindly sent in by John Franklin; please send us your funny out of the mouths of children....
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See more clean funny kids jokes, also funny pictures for teens