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Funy Sports Pictures and Jokes

Sporting Jokes and Funy Sports Pictures that made Will and Guy ChuckleSports Jokes

This section lists our favourite sports jokes, stories.  Wherever you meet sportsmen, whether from soccer, cricket, rugby or golf you will find banter and a raft of unlikely nicknames.

More Pages of Funy Sports Jokes and Funny PicturesWrong Golf Club

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Selection of Sports Jokes and Funny Stories

Great Golf One-linersDrink and Drive Golf Range

  • It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course: Babe Ruth
  • Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn't a lot of strokes when you consider the course: Lee Trevino
  • These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow: Sam Snead
  • If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball: Jack Lemmon

Funy Sports Quotes

Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach, 'You guys line up alphabetically by height.' And ' You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle.' He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is

Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota, 'He's a guy who gets up at six o' clock in the morning regardless of what time it is.'

Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player, 'I told him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'

Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins, 'He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings.'

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Colemanballs - Funy sports commentary

A truly international field, no Britons involved.colmanballs david colman's bloopers
David Coleman

For those of you watching who do not have television sets, live commentary is on Radio 2.
Ted Lowe (Snooker)

Born in America. John returned to his native Japan
Mike Gratton

Flexible Phil

Phil decided that at the ripe old age of 53 he needed to get himself into shape. He visited the local gym and spoke to a personal trainer who asked him if he could do the splits.

'Of course I can't', responded Phil.

'Well, just how flexible are you?' she questioned.

'Umm', replied Phil, 'I can't do Thursdays.'

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Some interesting and amusing facts about games in pubs in the UK:

  • Glasgow's licensing bench banned all pub games from the city's 1,100 bars in 1939 because 'games encourage drinking.' A pub in Durham had to cancel a mouse race because it was found that 15 0f the 18 mice were pregnant and the other 3 were too tired to run at all
  • In the 1930's it was found that dominoes was the most popular pub game in Bolton
  • In the 14th Century British monarchs forbade pub games because they wanted their subjects to practise archery
  • Early versions of shove ha' penny were played in taverns and inns some 500 years ago
  • Darts is played regularly by 6 million people in the UK, many of them in pubs
  • The game of bar billiards was invented in Belgium and arrived in the UK in the 1930's
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World Cup Thief's Own Goal

A thief who stole a World Cup ticket from a woman's handbag was caught after sitting down to watch the game next to his victim's husband.

The 34-year-old mugged Eva Standmann, 42, as she made her way to the Munich stadium for the Brazil-Australia game at the weekend and discovered the ticket in her bag. He took the woman's place in the stadium where he was met by her husband Berndt, 43, who immediately called security. A Munich police spokesman said, 'The thief found the ticket in the bag and decided to watch the game, not expecting to sit next to his victim's husband, who immediately informed officers on duty at the stadium.'

 

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