Funny Tour de France Jokes
Why Do They Do That?
Two Irishmen were sitting in a pub watching the Tour de France on TV.
Seamus shook his head and asked, "Whoi t'e hell do they do that?"
"Go on them boikes for moiles and moiles, up and down t'e hills, round
t'e bends. Day
"Tis all for the prestige and the money," replied Mick, "You know the
winner gets about
"Yeah, I understand that." said Seamus, "But why do all the others do it?"
An Alternative View: French Dope Testing Methods Revealed Thanks to Terry C Wise
Anti French Sentiment [Not supported by Will and Guy]
The 3 substances banned by the French, that were found in Lance's hotel room were as follows:
Funny French Notices
Seen in a Paris hotel elevator:
Outside a Paris dress shop:
How I Beat Lance Armstrong
'I don't remember you ever beating Lance Armstrong' commented Eric, the Sun journalist. 'When would that have occurred?' 'In the seventh stage of the Tour de France in 2002, I beat him over the head with my water bottle - but he still won the tour!'
The photo of the devil was taken by Bogdan Cristel and Le Diable is known as Didi and is a common sight on the tour de France.
Comedian Borat in the Tour de France
An Irish Perspective on the Tour de France
Two Irishmen were sitting in a pub when the Tour de France came on the main TV channel RTé. Mick and Seamus watched the cyclists for a while then Seamus asked, "Why do they do that?"
"Do what?" said Mick
"Go on them bikes for miles and miles, up and down the hills, round the bends. Day after day, week after week. No matter if it's icy, raining, snowing, hailing . . . why would they torture themselves like that?"
"It's all for the money," says the Mick. "The winner gets half a million Euros (Dollars)."
"I see." says Seamus, "But why do the others do it?"
'I've really had it with my dog: he'll chase anyone on a bicycle,' muttered Sachin angrily.
'So what are you going to do - leave him at the dog's home? Give him away? Sell him? Answered his friend, Rajiv.
'No, nothing that drastic, I think I'll just confiscate his bike,' finished Sachin.
A Cyclist in Heaven
A very devout cyclist dies and goes to heaven. Saint Peter meets him at the gate. First thing the cyclist asks is whether there are bicycles in heaven.
'Sure,' says St. Peter, 'let me show you,' and he leads the guy into the finest Velodrome you can imagine.
'This is great,' the cyclist says.
'It certainly is,' says St. Peter. 'You will have a custom bike and the best cycling clothes you've ever seen, and your personal masseuse will always available.'
As they speak a blur streaks by them on the boards riding a Mavic bike. 'Wow!' the cyclist exclaims. 'That guy was so fast that can only be Sir Chris Hoy.' 'No,' says St. Peter, 'that was God on the bike; he only thinks he's Chris Hoy.'
In the School Gym
'Lie flat on your backs, class, and circle your feet in the air as if you were riding your bikes,' said Dave Rolfe, the gym teacher.
Dwayne! What are you doing? Move your feet, boy.'
'I'm freewheeling, sir.'
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